House-hunting...and blenders?!?

As some of you know, I've been house-hunting for a few months, now. I always knew that purchasing a home would be a stressful experience, but I never thought it would be so much so that it would permeate my dreams in such a weird way. Last night, I had this dream that I was driving around looking for some house that was near where I live now. I found the block and as I drove around, I noticed that not only were all of the houses dilapidated to shyte, but they all had old, out-of-commission, over-sized blenders on their front lawns. Some more than others. Oddly enough, this didn't bother me during the dream, but it annoyed the shit out of me when I woke up, this morning.

"Why the hell were there so many blenders?" I thought to myself. As far as I know, I never had any encounters with 'em. A blender never punched me in the face and stole my lunch money. I never had the following conversation with a blender:

Me: "Hey, blender. What's up?"
Blender: "Fuck you, dickbag!"

I started to think way too hard on the subject and then it hit me. Could it be that maybe my problem lies with the fact that blenders are secretly the assholes of the appliances world? Sounds weird, applying a negative personality to an inanimate object like a blender, but, think about it. You take a perfectly formed natural object like an Apple or a Carrot or a kitten, offer it to the blender, and what does it do? It turns it to mushy shit! Come on, now. What kind of way is that to treat a gift? What an ungrateful asshole you are, blender.

While you ponder that thought, I'm gonna finish my Earl Grey tea. First time I've ever had this. It's not bad. It's like drinking a cup of ammonia and knowing it WON'T kill me. I feel so reckless.

Stay awesome,

S